By Melissa Ann
Most people probably remember the game “Circle, circle. Dot, dot. Now you got your cootie shot” from their elementary years. Millions of children have been saved from an imaginary childhood illness thanks to this simple procedure on the playground. Unfortunately for the children at Ft. Chicken Elementary, the cootie shot wasn’t as successful. Directed by Jonathan Milott and Cary Murnion, horror/comedy Cooties was released in September 2015 by Lionsgate Premiere.
The chicken plant in Ft. Chicken, Illinois is sickingly out of code and mishandles their livestock in dangerous ways. Products from the plant are shipped out anyway, which include a batch of nuggets delivered to the local elementary school. One of the students is oblivious to the black ooze spilling out of her nugget and enjoys her school lunch. Meanwhile, aspiring horror writer Clint Hadson (Elijah Wood) moves back to his hometown of Ft. Chicken after briefly moving to New York City for his writing career. He takes a job substituting at the elementary and is reunited with his former crush, and now fellow teacher, Lucy McCormick (Allison Pill). Unluckily for Clint, Lucy is dating Wade Johnson (Rainn Wilson), the hardass PE teacher. During Clint’s class, the child who ate the tainted nugget starts changing in appearance and savagely attacks another student, which causes him to also be infected. The school becomes overran with infected children very quickly and will attack anyone on campus. Only a small group of teachers and students survive the initial attacks and they must find a way to get out of the school alive.
While some horror fans claim that horror and humor aren’t meant to mix, movies like Cooties prove that isn’t true. The cast worked very well together and the banter between Elijah Wood and Rainn Wilson is natural. There are several references to other flicks that movie buffs will enjoy spotting, especially when Rainn’s character calls Elijah’s character a hobbit. Well played, sir. In addition to the witty dialogue and characters, Cooties has some fantastically disgusting gore and effects. One scene in particular that really made me wince was the student eating the chicken nugget. It was incredibly unappetizing and made me rethink food choices a few times. The movie also breaks an unspoken rule, which is violently killing kids on camera. Sure these kids are flesh-eating monsters, but it doesn’t make it any less disturbing to watch a child get beaten to death or getting burned alive. Still, it was a riot from beginning to end and Cooties will definitely make viewers laugh and cringe at the same time
Rating: 9/10
