By Melissa Antoinette Garza
ORPHAN (2009) is a great flick. Go watch it!
Good review, folks!
Okay! Okay! I’ll tell you a little something about it. I’m not doing anything right now, anyways.
Kate (Veera Farmiga) and Dipshit John (Peter Sarsgaard) are married and have two kids. They would have three but Kate suffered a still birth. That fucked her up pretty bad and she became a drunk for a little while. She became sober after her kids nearly died in an ice pond and Dipshit had to run to the rescue.
Don’t get too hot over Dipshit though. He’s not Prince Charming. He cheated on Kate a decade earlier but only fessed up two years prior. She’s still heated over the whole thing. Still, these cats decide it’s a great time to adopt an orphan.
They take in Esther (Isabelle Fuhrman) who is a badass! On her first day of school, she comes down in an adorable dress. Kate and Dipshit’s son Daniel (Jimmy Bennett) laughs at her. Though their young deaf daughter Max (Aryana Engineer) takes to Esther a lot easier than Daniel, that little brat laughs too. Kate suggests Esther put on jeans, but like a rock-star, she refuses. She goes to school knowing some mean girl bitch is going to start shit and that orphan is ready to play! You thought Annie was tough? You haven’t seen Esther pissed.
Sure enough, some smart-mouthed little witch decides to pipe up and tell Esther she looks like Bo-Peep in the dress. Well guess who has an accident and breaks her ankle at recess? That’ll learn ya!
Admittedly, Esther isn’t perfect. I know she sounds perfect, but she’s got some problems. She develops an unsettling crush on Dipshit John while gas-lighting Kate. The gas-lighting stuff is pretty funny! Kate’s a good woman. She loves her kids. She really doesn’t deserve the shit that’s happening to her, but I’m crazy. I get some perverse thrill out of the genius within the manipulation going on! She’s a smart little bitch and I admire that.
When Kate realizes something is wrong, she decides it’s best to give Esther back. Dipshit disagrees. He thinks Kate is the problem. I do not like Dipshit! Hence the reason, I call him Dipshit! That’s actually not really his character’s name. It’s just John.
So Dipshit, doesn’t see anything that’s going on in front of him. His antics combined with feisty fun Esther’s is too much for Kate and she decides to buy two bottle of wine. In her defense, Esther is doing some really wacky stuff.
Though she doesn’t have any proof, Kate is sure that Esther had something to do with the murder of the head nun who ran the orphanage. She was also involved in a fire at her last house. To her face, Esther uses Kate’s stillbirth against her. She tells Kate off and then plays nice in front of Dipshit. She manipulates a therapist into thinking she’s really trying to be a great daughter and that Kate ostracizes her. Esther is amazing – evil…but amazing!
Though Kate bought the wine, she resists temptation and doesn’t drink. Little scamp Esther finds the bottles and tells Dipshit who immediately decides to have an intervention. Fuck that guy! Talk to your wife and respect women’s intuition, you prick!
In the end, Kate battles it out against Esther in efforts to save her family. There’s a pretty decent but ridiculous twist put in the mix and the film ends on a solid note.
The cast did a splendid job. I’m actually a huge fan of Peter Sarsgaard and have been ever since SHATTERED GLASS (2003). I just hate his character in ORPHAN. He still did a great job portraying him though. I really believed he was a dipshit through the entire movie. Kudos!
Vera Farmiga is always fabulous too. She owns the roles she plays and this one is no different. If I wasn’t fucked up, I’d so be rooting for Kate. She’s a powerful matriarch who overcame all sorts of bad shit (not least of which having Dipshit for a husband) and she doesn’t stop fighting. She’s fabulous.
That said, I am fucked up so I like Esther! She’s entertaining. She makes me laugh. I like her devious nature. I can’t give Isabelle Fuhrman enough credit for her performance in the film. She nails it. I love her. The fact that she was so young when this was made is astounding. She was born to act and this movie proves it.
If you haven’t seen this already, go watch it. I think you’ll like it. I do and I have great taste.
As a side note, on the DVD there was a PSA from an orphanage warning that this is just a film and that orphans are cool.
Ummmm…
Maybe, don’t give a kid to the people who need reassurance after watching ORPHAN because they suddenly think every child that needs a home is a homicidal maniac.
Just a thought.
#NotAllOrphans
Scared Stiff Rating: 8/10
