By James
Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. I remember saying that to my friend’s daughter or I saw it in a movie. One or the other. Well, some douche bag, soy boy, EBT warrior scumbag, Aaron Urbanski, went to a breakfast with Santa event at a church in Texas and began telling the kids that there was no Santa. No Santa? Well, you won’t think that when Bubba is shoving a candy cane up your ass in prison. Texas don’t play. You don’t have all those soy boy cellar dwellers there that cry for scum like this clown.
I spoke to the number one mall Santa in the world who goes by an unpronounceable symbol and he had the following to say about this matter. (Reader discretion is advised)
Ho Ho to the fucking ho. I am a mall Santa. How much do you think they fucking pay me for that? I have to eat whatever I can find on the outdated discount stand at the grocery store and the mother fuckers at the mall won’t even let me have a tip jar. They pay me minimum wage and sometimes one of those little fuckers shits in my lap. Hey, I know it goes with the job, but they could at least pay me more than some soy boy that sits at home and just collects a check and uses his EBT card. Come on America. Wake up! Ho Ho Ho. This guy trying to cost me my job by saying Santa don’t exist is on my naughty list and that means that if I ever see him and he makes the mistake of sitting on my lap, he’ll have a big gift from behind and he won’t be able to sit down for a week. Eat me.
