By Polly “The News” Hughes
OMG! My friend, Morgan Freeman, has just been given a right uppercut to the groin with this new death hoax, insisting that he died. Really? Well, I just called him and he’s alive and well and he’s fighting mad. “Polly, yo, these scumbags that think that I’m looking for a Shlongshank Redemption need to get a reality check. I’m not dead. I’m alive and well and ready to star in Bucket List 2, but if these ass clowns keep talking smack, I ain’t gonna do it!” (Note: Comments may not have been made by Freeman)
Disregard all those Freeman haters. They’re not all that and a bag of cool ranch Doritos. They are my ass.
