By James Witherspoon
Yo, check this out. McDonald’s CEO, Steve Easterbrook, decided that it was time to quit his job after banging some dude that was flipping burgers. Really? Really? Ain’t you know that there are hookers out there Easterbrook? Get with one of them skanks. YA HEARD!
They’ve not said anything about the person he’s been knocking boots with, but y’all know that McDonald’s got shit for benefits. If the CEO puts his junk in your mouth, y’all know that your next check is gonna see a bump and you just found out the secret sauce on the Big Mac. YA HEARD!
Now, this poor man has to step down because of all these libtard, soy boy, cellar dwelling geeks out there that don’t want to him to get any booty. Well, how about he come to your house and nail you from behind?
I spoke to my boy, Ronald McDonald, and he had the following to say:
“James, thanks for this platform to talk about the former CEO of the company. I knew he was dirty. He grabbed my honker the last time I saw him. He also rubbed his crotch on the backside of Grimace. You know that ain’t right.
He once met up with some of these soy boy protesters in a bathroom and walked out saying, they loved my Big Mac. Even with that, they should not fire him and he should not step down. You know who should step down? Those janitors that we hire. Try going to one of our restaurants and not find piss all over the floor. Talk about being McFucked.”
Thanks Ronald. Y’all know your dong is a whopper. YA HEARD!
