By Geno McGahee
One of my favorite movies is SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION and I always wondered how good it would be if the lead character was Cobra. In the 1989 film LOCK UP, I get my answer, as Sylvester Stallone plays Frank Leone, a convict with a few weeks left, but things go sour quick.
Frank (Stallone) is living in a minimum security prison and is even allowed on a work release program where his girlfriend, Melissa (Darlanne Fluegel), can visit him and get in some cheap feels. Life is good for Frank and the end of his ordeal is almost upon him, but things change when an unexpected transfer takes place. In the middle of the night, prison guards from another prison show up and drag Frank out and bring him to the biggest shithole prison in the world. I can’t imagine any prison in reality being this dark and unmaintained.
Warden Drumgoole (Donald Sutherland) has a bone to pick with Frank. Back in the day, when Drumgoole was the warden of another prison, Frank escaped. On top of that, he went to the press and fucked Drumgoole right in the ass and ruined his career. Now Drumgoole is in charge of the worst prison in the world but he’s planned his revenge and Frank is going to pay for escaping in the past.
Meissner (John Amos) is the lead guard and he is just awesome. Amos is such a great presence in film. He was great in DIE HARD 2 and COMING TO AMERICA and he’s great here. Stallone could have left the film and let Amos carry this and he would have, but he has to settle for the lead guard position and he does the bidding of Drumgoole.
Despite the shitty conditions, Frank starts to make friends. Dallas (Tom Sizemore) sees Frank as a way to escape prison, but also likes cars. Eclipse (Frank McRae) is the mechanic at the prison and is hesitant at first, but eventually realizes that Frank knows his shit. McRae…I was trying to think about where I knew him from and then it hit me. He was the security guard in the original NATIONAL LAMPOON’S VACATION.
Frank now has his gang, including a young idiot, First Base (Larry Romano), but he has an asshole screwing with him at every turn. Every time he’s in the yard, there he is, Chink (Sonny Landham), ready to beat him up or stab him. Sometimes he even sexually harasses poor Frank, making kissy faces at him. That happens in prison. At least I think it does. Every prison movie includes sexual harassment and beat downs. It’d be boring if they all got along.
With three weeks to go, Frank plans to just ride it out, but Drumgoole will not stand for it. He is determined to push him into screwing up so he can increase his sentence and he has some perverted guards that are doing all they can to make it happen. Frank is given the worst prison job, gets beaten by the guards, has Chink fucking with him at every turn, but he’s not going to allow Drumgoole to win.
One of the biggest wastes in the film is First Base. Frank should have never taken him under his wing, but he did and it screwed him more than once. It got him into a football game where he got the living shit beat out of him and it got worse. First Base takes the car that Frank built and drove it through the garage and through the yard. After Frank stops it, Drumgoole insists that the car be destroyed and Frank has to stay in the hole. (Spoiler) First Base is thankfully killed. It was predictable, but I didn’t expect Frank to go ape shit and seek immediate revenge. He only knew the asshole a week or so and he got beaten and put into the hole for half of that. Good riddance.
Drumgoole will not stop until Frank tries to escape and he finally figures out how to do it. One of the prison guards pretends to be another inmate and tells Frank that he’s getting out in a day and he’s going to rape his girlfriend. I can’t imagine how Drumgoole approached the guard. That’s a very unusual request, but he does it and, finally, Frank is going to escape. Now his sentence will be increased and his ass belongs to Drumgoole.
Just when Drumgoole thinks he has Frank by the balls, the tables turn. Drumgoole is put into the electric chair and it’s a great scene. With the threat of death, Drumgoole confesses to the group of prison guards that apparently aren’t part of his naughty group. This leads to true justice for Frank and a terrible song by Survivor with screenshots of the film in the credits, just in case you want to relive Stallone smiling or meeting people, or if you just haven’t got enough of seeing Donald Sutherland with a mustache. It’s terribly ridiculous and entertaining stuff.
LOCK UP is a lot like SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION, with an evil warden, a young and foolish kid that gets killed, and a prisoner getting screwed over and seeking escape. Granted, I would argue that SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION is much better than this, but as far as a non-ROCKY Stallone film, this is pretty good.
I actually really enjoyed LOCK UP. It has a great cast of familiar faces from other action films of the time and has some great lines that make it a winner. The prison guard that was going to rape Stallone’s girlfriend gets a “rape this” as Stallone punches him in the balls. Amos has “two things to know” that he explains to Frank upon his arrival. They are “I’m Meissner” and “Don’t fuck with Meissner.” It’s just a lot of fun all around. I recommend this one.
