By Geno McGahee
“Maybe nobody knows how to stop him.” – Dr. Loomis (Donald Pleasence)
It has been six years since the 1982 release of HALLOWEEN III: Season of the Witch, a movie that gets zero respect in this horror world. I saw that it recently made two lists. The first list said it was one of the least scary films of all time and then the other list said it was one of the worst horror movies of all time. Are these people freaking high? That was a great movie, but because Michael Myers was not in it, people don’t give it a shot. I enjoy the Season of the Witch, but the public demanded Myers back, even though he was blown up along with Dr. Loomis (Donald Pleasence) and both were dead, right? Well, I guess that they were supposed to be but the fans refused it. Hey, if Jason Voorhees can come back ten dozen times, why can’t those two? So, we have them back, a little crispy, but back nonetheless in the fourth entry of this popular series.
We begin with a foolish Doctor Hoffman (Michael Pataki), who elects to transfer the body of patient Michael Myers without the expressed consent of Dr. Loomis. He really dismisses Loomis and that is never a good idea, and the transfer doesn’t go well, of course. We have some unlucky EMTs that meet the wrath of the killer, but that’s OK. EMTs are expendable in horror movies. When you see one, you know that they are dead meat. How about utility workers? Yep, they don’t last long either. I hate to give this away, but Myers gets one of those too. Remember that he killed a security guard in the second one. This guy is a prick. He goes after people just trying to make an honest buck. You don’t see him killing politicians or members of NAMBLA. He goes after the working man…the good guy, but then again, the movie isn’t fair to these people at all anyway. They are on the screen for two seconds before they are killed. Maybe they will talk about their family for a minute or a hot date that they have that night, but it’s meaningless. You can see it in their eyes. They have that “oh shit, I’m an EMT in a horror movie” look on their faces.
Loomis knows that Myers is returning home to Haddonfield to kill again and plans to meet him there for a showdown to stop him. He meets up with him at a gas station and all hell breaks loose, but not before he kills a nondescript mechanic. Maybe Myers is making a statement against the American worker. With all of the work going overseas, perhaps he views the American worker as lazy and is hoping that these exploits will jar the workforce awake and bring the jobs home….or they just wanted a higher body count and who doesn’t like to see Myers in action? I’ll let you be the judge.
Now why is Myers coming back to Haddonfield? Did he come back because of the large amount of EMTs, mechanics, and security guards? Although that is a perk, he has returned with some unfinished business. He has a relative that he wants to kill: Jamie Lloyd (Danielle Harris). Young Jamie has moved into the Carruthers’ household, watched over by her adopted sister Rachel (Ellie Cornell). Jamie has visions of Myers, screams a lot, and desperately wants a loving family…and how about some good friends at school? Half of her class follow her around chanting: “Jamie’s uncle’s the boogie man.” If I were there I would have kicked those fuckers in the balls a few times.
The part about Jamie’s uncle being the boogie man makes a lot of sense and brings a sense of realism to this movie. Who doesn’t have a creepy uncle? Most creepy uncles do things like dress up like Santa for Christmas and take part in the Boy Scouts. They hardly ever wear a William Shatner mask and kill people with a knife. It would be great if this creepy uncle took out all of the creepy and perverted uncles. That would be a great Halloween.
Loomis plans to protect Jamie and take down Myers for good, but it’s easier said than done of course. We wouldn’t have so many movies if it was easy. What I like about this movie is that there is some originality. I liked that a group of rednecks went out on a Myers hunt and actually get a kill. (Spoiler) They kill one of their buddies, not Myers.
I also like the Michael Myers impersonators. As the town goes crazy, a bunch of high school kids come out in full Myers gear and surprise Loomis and Sheriff Meeker (Beau Starr). They nearly get shot but have a good laugh and it amused me too. Loomis is not amused and when Pleasence delivers the lines as he sees a group of people that look like Myers together, it’s captivating. He says: “Dear God,” not knowing what is going on and probably thinking that he had found some way to clone himself.
Now there is a love triangle thrown into this one with Rachel, her boyfriend Brody (Sasha Jenson), and the easy hot chick that Brody works with, Kelly (Kathleen Kinmont), who is also the daughter of the Sheriff. The town in crime infested, the daughter’s a slut…that Sheriff Meeker is a failure all around. Why would Loomis align himself with this loser? Maybe he was trying to get with his daughter or the hunt for Myers was so unfavorable that he had to take what he could get.
The love triangle doesn’t do a lot to help or hurt the film, and it is really unremarkable. The focus is on Myers, Loomis, and young Jamie. I think that the introduction of Jamie is a great addition to the film. They needed it too. They can’t just say Myers is coming back because he’s really fucking pissed off now can they? He needs a valid reason. Jamie is the reason.
There is a showdown in the elementary schoolhouse and for some reason, Myers either changed his mask or he was so terrified that all of his hair turned white. I never noticed that before. His mask doesn’t have brown hair as it did in the majority of this movie. It now has white hair, but one minute later, he is wearing the normal one again. Is he working with a partner? Was that one of those teenagers? Actually, they probably rearranged things with the editing of this film. At one point, Rachel shoots Myers in the face with a fire extinguisher and that would have turned his hair white. That’s the most likely cause…just a flub in editing. Then again, launching Loomis out of the window should have come first.
You know (spoiler), I actually thought that the rednecks might actually survive, but Myers found out that they were trying to take him out and he got revenge in a very neat way. He killed them all in the bed of a speeding pickup truck. There was yet another editing thing I caught. Myers rips Rachel’s sweater and then in the next scene, it’s perfectly fine. Then they play the same exact ripping sweater scene. The editor must have had an off night.
The ending of this film is FANTASTIC. First, (spoiler) Myers gets hit full force by a pickup truck going 50 or so miles per house, then he is shot by an entire police force along with some rednecks, then he falls down a well to his death (or so they think). What a great way to take out Myers! Although I freaking enjoy the way that they took out Myers, the very ending is so good that it’s worth nearly a point in and of itself. I won’t tell you what it is. It’s better that you are surprised and enjoy it, and really enjoy the reaction of Loomis. Freaking hilarious.
HALLOWEEN: The Return of Michael Myers is another example of why this series is the best series ever in horror. Up until H20, the movies were quality and put forth a great story and great dialogue. I really enjoyed this entry and I highly recommend it.
Scared Stiff Rating: 8/10. This is a Happy Halloween!
