By Forris Day Jr.
The Unholy Sideshow is an order of serial killer, magician sideshow freaks who are in charge of performing a ritual sacrifice that needs to be done every 200 years to keep the dead…well…..dead. Unfortunately two evil mad scientist-black magicians are fighting and holding up the whole process. This is a drag because now there are zombies popping up out of their graves everywhere, and you know what a mess zombies can make. They leave holes in the ground, flesh all over the place and they just don’t add much to a conversation. Time is of the essence and the clock is running fast. Can the zombies and other evil creatures be held back for another 200 years or will the Earth be enveloped in a darkness only outdone by the Lance Armstrong doping scandal? We can only root for evil, because only evil can save us now.
The movie itself is not that great. It has a weak story line and is chock full of bad acting BUT it is still a fun movie to watch. You can tell these folks worked hard and had fun making it. It is filled with genuine freak-show talent. There are sword swallowers, fire eaters, a really cool full body tattooed man with horns and a couple of really creepy clowns. You get to see a lot of the freak-show stunts and they are indeed real, so as the saying goes “Do not try this at home”. Very ornate settings and colorful sets add to the fun of this one. It’s a perfect Halloween movie when you just want to sit around and enjoy the holiday. I consider Halloween a holiday. Yes…you could watch it anytime, but I think it is perfect for the fun that is the Halloween season. It’s shot in standard definition, in other words, NOT widescreen but really, it doesn’t take away from the fun of the flick. One of my favorite creatures was a monster I can only describe as a guy dressed up like a giant glowing potato. He is locked up in a basement laboratory of one of the mad scientists. I know, weird isn’t it? The sets are full of dry ice smoke, glowing vessels and items that look like torture devices. The zombie makeup is really good and all the actors are pretty likeable…even the evil ones. Some decent special effects top of the gore fest.
If you enjoy everything that is fun and cheesy then “Freakshow Apocalypse” may fit the bill for what ails you. Grab some popcorn and a soda, call up all your friends who like cheesy somewhat homemade movies and party till the zombies come home!
Rating: 7.5/10 – Super Freaky
