By James Witherspoon
Yo, check this out. I love Whoppers. I like those double Whoppers too. Hell man, Burger King has the best burgers out of all of those fast food joints, but sometimes they use too much salt. YA HEARD! I also love Taco Bell and tacos and my neighbors always know when I’m making my famous turkey tacos in my huge luxurious house while I talk to high ranking industry executives of film as we plan my next big acting role. YA HEARD!
Now, I drove my BMW 640i Gran Coupe through the drive thru at Burger King and saw some beggar asking for money. GET A JOB player! Then this joke said he was a film producer but the cat had a .96 cent suit, bad/fake British accent and a terrible wig that looked like road kill. I told that bitch to take a hike and get a job. Mother fucker probably had an EBT card.
So I buy a couple of these BK tacos and brought them home. I was sort of excited for these but when I opened up the packaging, the truth was sad. It’s like going on a blind date and you see a 350 pound sea lion waiting for you. I won’t blind date again. I don’t date girls with asses that look like pillow cases full of door knobs. YA HEARD!
Well, if you thought the Whoppers were salty, these put those to shame and the meat is not meat, it’s mush! I have no idea what this shit was. And it’s only half full and it greased through the taco shell. I took one bite and threw away the rest. What total garbage. I’d rather go downtown on a crack whore then put this shit in my mouth again.
