By Melissa Antoinette Garza
After Bill Maher continued his streak of being the biggest douche ever by insulting Stan Lee, his work and comic book fans worldwide, I needed some comfort food so I’m venturing to one of my faves. I’ve loved the THE BURBS (1989) since I first saw it nearly 30 years ago and it’s still a movie I run to when I have a bad day.
The movie begins with Ray Peterson (Tom Hanks) taking a much needed vacation. His wife Carol (Carrie Fisher) wants to go to the lake to relax, but Ray wants to stay home. He wins and decides to enjoy the week while in his own abode.
Sadly, the enjoyment turns to insanity as the new neighbors are more than a bit odd – not that the existing neighbors are normal (more on that later). The recent arrivals to suburbia are the Klopeks. Among them are early-20s Hans Klopek (Courtney Gains), old man Reuben Klopek (Brother Theodore) and the dashing head-of-household Dr. Werner Klopek (Henry Gibson). He’s my favorite Klopek! The trio’s arrival and subsequent behavior is mysterious to say the least.
First, no one knows what happened to the old neighbors. Second, Hans is seen late at night carrying large trash-bags that carry somewhat of a human form, bones are found buried in the yard and they have a much larger than average furnace, which has a crematorium vibe that doesn’t go unnoticed.
Ray’s curiosity is peaked, but Carol tries to reel him in and assure him it’s nothing. I love her in this role. So often, the men in horror films are given the logical lines of “You’re paranoid darling. There’s a rational explanation for this all,” when in fact something horrific is going on. Here the roles are reversed and it is Carol who attempts to convince Ray that he’s just bored on vacation and looking for something to keep his mind active.
Ray’s other neighbors and his friends will not let him heed his wife’s advice. Art (Rick Ducommun) is Ray’s best friend, but is a bombastic, over-the-top boy in man’s body. His wife is gone the same week that Ray is on vacation so he’s already in rambunctious mode before the adventure begins. He’s campy, silly and not the brightest bulb, but he’s awesome.
Similarly, Mark Rumsfield (Bruce Dern) is amazing. He walks around in Army fatigues, is an alpha-male on steroids. He’s convinced he’s right, but nearly always wrong. He’s married to a vivacious, young beautiful and kind woman, Bonnie (Wendy Schaal). Oddly, it makes perfect sense that he’s married to someone that on the surface appears out of his league. Mark has enough charisma and personality to charm the most lovely of ladies. I love that. Genuine bravado is so enjoyable to watch. Mark has that. He doesn’t deserve it. He’s a dummy, but he’s an awesome dummy with a hot wife.
Cheering on the boys crazy adventure is teenage stoner Ricky Butler (Corey Feldman) who lives just few houses down. He helps/hurts them occasionally when they break-in, but he’s never really a part of the core group. Other than distracting emergency personnel and police, he really doesn’t do much. He orders pizza and parties with his friends watching the events unfold like a movie, but beyond that let’s the men do the dirty work.
Rounding out the neighborhood is Walter Seznick (Gale Gordon). Seznick is a catalyst for much for the roused suspicion. When he disappears leaving his beloved dog to roam freely, the neighbors worry.
Bonnie and Carol remain unconvinced and insist that their men go to meet the Klopeks face-to-face. Ray pretends that he’s no longer suspicious, but he finds Seznick’s toupee at the house and hides it. He later shows Mark and Art and the three become fully invested in finding out the truth.
I love this movie for so many reasons. One is that they pay homage to RACE WITH THE DEVIL (1975) showing a quick clip of the flick and then having a nightmare sequence.
Next is the fact that the male protagonists aren’t really going for the ride because they necessarily believe it’s true. These men are written like 11 year old boys who found a time capsule. Though they’re obviously right in their assumptions, most of their motivation is grounded on excitement and fun. It’s crazy because both the women and men are correct. The women are 100% accurate that the men are looking to kill boredom and are acting like kids. The men just happen to be right in connecting the dots.
This makes for such an interesting film in so many respects. My favorite aspect is that the dumbest people imaginable resolve the situation. In many horror flicks, the characters are smart and make all the right movies (like in the aforementioned RACE WITH THE DEVIL), but still are in a hopeless situation. Still, they can’t survive. Here, the men make every wrong move a person can make, yet prevail. There’s definitely something deeper here that I haven’t mentally delved into, but it makes an amazing film even more interesting.
I enjoy male comradeship comedies when they’re done properly and this one is done phenomenally well. They also mix in a bit of female bonding and show strong, fierce women who on the outside are very different, yet get along marvelously. For a male focused film, THE BURBS treats women with great respect showcasing both a complete fem doll who spends hours in the mirror before stepping out of the house and the modern do-it-all housewife/mother. Neither are caricatures and both are feminists in their own way. They stand their ground and they get their way. One may argue that Mark is a sexist and they’re probably right. Still, Bonnie doesn’t let him get away with that bullshit. She’s no doormat. His sexism isn’t a reflection on her. It’s just one more quality about him that shows that he’s behind the times, but was lucky enough to find a patient woman to smarten him up.
In my favorite scene, Carol forbids Ray from going out with Mark and Art. The two show up and literally kick sand begging her to let him come out to play. All four do a spectacular job in that scene. It cracks me up every single time I watch it.
When this came out it seemed that everyone around me hated it. I’d rent it constantly from the video store and drive people nuts with it. Over the years, it has definitely received a warmer reception. Now it’s something I regularly show at parties and nearly always it gets a positive response.
I don’t even know where to begin with the cast on this one. Their names should tell you everything. Tom Hanks portrays Ray in a sweet and compassionate way that secures the viewer roots for them. I noticed for the first time today that he watches Mr. Rogers in this and he’s going to be in the new Mr. Rogers movie. Maybe that’s an omen, it won’t be awful.
Carrie Fisher is a goddess of the sky, now. I love her. She’s always fabulous and her array of work will always be treasured. Unsurprisingly, she is phenomenal in this. On a side note, during filming she saw Feldman was struggling with addiction. Whereas everyone else was angry and distant with his behavior, she wrapped her arms around him and offered help. He was a dick about it, but later grateful. Just further evidence that she was a Princess both on and off camera.
Wendy Schaal succeeded brilliantly as she towed the line of a fem softie and a forceful equal. I love characters that capture the femininity in feminism. Bonnie is more than an equal to Mark. She’s his superior, but doesn’t throw it in his face. She’s passive enough to let him have his way until she needs to be assertive to shut him down. In the truest form a feminist has the right to choose to be a sex kitten one day and a dominatrix the next. That’s how I see Bonnie.
As for how I see Bruce Dern, he’s Bruce fucking Dern! He owns everything he’s in. His role in this should have been supporting, but he turned it into a goddamn lead. When he’s on, all eyes are on him. Much like DIGGSTOWN (1992), he owns the camera. It is only Dern’s conveyance of Mark that makes the character likable. Dern plays him as insane and funny. Sure, he tells off and insults sanitation workers, he sends people on dangerous missions feigning knowledge he doesn’t have, he’s a misogynist and goes from 0-100 real quick, but he believes he has the moral high-ground. Mark is so messed up that he wouldn’t even consciously be able to acknowledge his real motives in going after the Klopeks. He’s a boy pretending to be a solider and doesn’t even know it. I love him. At one point, when Mark sends Art up on an electrical line and Ray asks Mark why he didn’t go, he responds, “It’s very high.” He’s adorable. I love Bruce Dern so much.
Rick Ducommun is terrific! I love him. He has so many magnificent lines and delivers them hilariously. I love when he chides Ray for nothing and acts as though he has better ideas when he’s clueless. Art is such an asshole, but he’s too much fun to not like. It’s easy to see why Ray is so forgiving with him.
I thought the entire supporting cast was phenomenal. Brother Theodore, Courtney Gains and Gale Gordon were fantastic. I always love to see Dick Miller and Robert Picardo. Their minor appearance was hilarious.
Lastly, there’s Henry Gibson. I love him. On the Blu-ray there is an alternate scene where his dialogue is different and I suggest watching them both. The meek and mild manner Gibson gives Dr. Klopek is so opposite to every other character that it stands out marvelously. He’s the mad scientist. He’s a bizarre and should be unassuming. He’s a soft spoken and seemingly polite man, but Gibson keeps the truth in his eyes and the wicked smile he wears. He’s portraying a devil wearing a transparent disguise that makes everyone willingly fall into the Barnum Effect and pretend he’s the good guy image he flaunts.
THE BURBS highlights every awesome horror trope and pays homage to some of the best in weird TV. Right now this is on AMAZON Prime! If it’s been awhile, watch it again. It’s fucking fantastic!
Scared Stiff Rating: 9/10
