By Melissa Antoinette Garza
I haven’t seen SERIAL MOM (1994) in 20 years. When it first came out I loved it. I adore John Waters, but for some reason I just never picked this up once DVDs became a thing. I’m sure I still have my old VHS somewhere.
Watching this again with fresh eyes, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I remembered enough to know it was a parody of true crime films and that Kathleen Turner was a goddamn fem queen to be reckoned with in it, but beyond that my memory was shot.
The film opens in 1990s America with a household right out of the 50s. Beverly (Kathleen Turner) is a dutiful wife to dentist Eugene (Sam Waterston) and a devoted mother to teen children Misty (Ricki Lake) and Chip (Matthew Lillard).
The police arrive early in the morning to ask if anyone knows about nasty notes and calls their neighbor Mrs. Dottie Hinkle (Mink Stole) has been getting. They all proclaim their innocence, but one is lying.
Bev, despite swearing she never said the word pussy aloud, waits for everyone to leave and immediately pranks Hinkle. She says awful, but absolutely hilarious things to Dottie. Beverly takes complete delight in her neighbor’s outrage. To be fair, the wench did steal her parking spot. Oh for those keeping track, I’m totally #TeamSerialMom.
She doesn’t stop at just naughty words and fucking with Dottie. When Chip’s teacher Mr. Stubbins (John Badila) suggests he needs therapy because of his infatuation with horror films, she does the only sensible thing. She runs that little dweeb over with her car. BLOOD FEAST (1963) wins bitch!
After mowing down that conservative pipsqueak douche, Bev gets roused and wild in the bedroom. The hubby is happy to go for the ride, but worried about waking the children. The concern was warranted. Chip and Misty were disgusted to hear Bev’s intense moans of ecstasy.
Later we find out, Misty’s potential boyfriend Carl (Lonnie Horsey) is a total douche. Chip, Bev and Eugene all try to warn her away, but she ignores them. Carl tells her he’ll take her out on an official date if she loses 15lbs. Instead of telling him to go fuck himself and having him carried off to the wood-chipper, the girl tries to take down the pounds.
Misty gets stood up and though upset is also attracted to Detective Pike (Scott Morgan), Carl’s indiscretion is enough to sign his death warrant. Thankfully, Misty doesn’t shed too many tears and hooks up with a photographer.
Later two garbage-men make the mistake of telling Bev that Miss Ackerman (Mary Jo Catlett) doesn’t recycle. In a ridiculously over-the-top manner, they all express complete HATRED for the woman and her nonchalant attitude over the taxpayer’s burden. It’s this type of scene that just makes me adore Waters.
The body count rises and everyone grows suspicious of Bev. Eugene is shocked to find out his wife shared correspondence with serial killers and collected true crime memorabilia. Soon, every police officer in town is detailing her as they are certain she is guilty, but have no solid evidence. When Beverly hears that she’s been named a suspect on the radio, she shocks her family by laughing. Eugene stands by his wife and promises to get her therapy. She thinks she’s fine. I think she’s fine too. Those assholes had it coming.
At church as the police are trying to keep an eye on her, she raises a ruckus. Chip and his girlfriend Birdie (Patricia Dunnock) help her to escape only she later flees to take out an old lady who was rude and didn’t rewind her VHS upon returning it to the store Chip worked at.
Birdie, Chip and porn aficionado/Chip’s ex-friend Scotty (Justin Whalin) all follow her there. They witness the murder. Bev chases down Scotty. In her defense, Scotty does break the law. He doesn’t wear his seat belt. She chases him to a music concert where she is treated like a celebrity before being arrested.
During the trial, she fires her attorney and represents herself. Though it’s obvious she’s guilty, she sways the jury with her charm, flare and sex appeal. I love her.
She eats the witnesses alive and has everyone in court eating out of her palm. Family, friends and fans flood the courtroom in support of her. I love it so much. Even the garbage men come back and help her discredit a police officer. It’s hilarious. This stands the test of time so well. God bless, John Waters and Kathleen Turner. What a wonderful combo they made bringing this together.
This is so great. I have to go and buy this now. It’s naughty in the silliest of ways. The entire film is owned by Turner. She’s just all sorts of wicked fabulousness.
I can’t recommend this one enough. If you have STARZ watch it there.
Scared Stiff Rating 7/10
