By Melissa Antoinette Garza
I love this movie. I know it has some problems. Hell, the entire ending was changed and scrapped because of the fatal illness that overtook child actress Heather O’Rourke. May that princess forever rest in peace. She was a phenomenal actress that was taken far too young.
Despite the real life tragedy and subsequent lack of promotion for POLTERGEIST III (1988), the end result is still a quality horror production with some cool scares and a level of bat-shit insanity that will always have me cheering. I like crazy. Hell, I am crazy!
The movie begins with Carol Anne moving into a skyrise apartment. She is being taken in by her Aunt Patricia (Nancy Allen) and her Uncle Bruce (Tom Skerritt) so her parents can get their act together after everything they’ve been through. Patricia is the sister of Carol Anne’s mom, but she is a big-time bitch. I hate that wench. Bruce is the coolest though. He’s a real man who is ready to bust the fuck out of some ghosts. Patty-girl wants to throw Carol Anne to the wolves every time shit gets real. I wanted Patty to die so bad in this.
Donna (Lara Flynn Boyle), Bruce’s biological teen daughter, is put in charge of babysitting Carol Anne while Bruce and Patricia go to a fancy dinner celebrating the construction of the skyrise. Donna is less than thrilled because she wants to get it on with her boyfriend Scott (Kipley Wentz). Scott gives me the fucking creeps. When first introduced to the character, he has this weird ass, pervy, smile that makes me think he just put something in some chick’s drink. Stay away from me, Scotty-boy. Imma don’t trust you at all. I hope Rev Kane (Nathan Davis) gets you!
Meanwhile, bitch Patty and hip Uncle Bruce are sending Carol Anne to prick psychiatrist Dr. Seaton (Richard Fire). Everyone thinks that the events from the first two flicks were simply in Carol Anne’s head and that she has the ability to manipulate adults into mass hysteria. Idiots! Seaton forces Carol Anne to talk about Rev Kane which brings the cult leader back to terrorize the poor kid. Even when Seaton sees paranormal activity right in front of his eyes, he’s such a skeptic that he dismisses it as his own mind playing tricks on him. He needs a fucking beat-down. That motherfucker makes me like Tangina (Zelda Rubinstein) and if you read my review from the last film, you know I hate that short strange fuck.
Speaking of Tangina, she gets a vision and sees that Carol Anne is in trouble so she bitches out the moron doctor and heads to the skyrise to help out.
Donna skips out on babysitting and leaves Carol Anne alone so she can go and party with a bunch of teenagers by the pool in the skyrise. It’s supposed to be locked, but since her daddy is one of the builders, she’s got the keys. That is when everything gets super crazy!
All the spirits who are attempting to get to the light are shown in a horrifying manner and as reflections in the mirrors that are nearly wall-to-wall in the skyrise. Everyone also has a weird doppelganger that lives on the other side of the mirror. It’s cool. It’s crazy. Mirrors freak me out so when this shit starts, I’m in like Flynn for this ride.
When Donna and her pervy boyfriend go missing as they’re taken to the other side, Patty and Bruce are notified and have to leave their party to investigate. Gross Scott is vomited out of a puddle and nearly completely frozen. Sadly, he’s not dead. I hate that shithead so much. Donna could do so much better than that curly haired douche with the creepy ass smile.
Seaton arrives on the scene thinking Carol Anne is playing tricks. He sees Scott frozen and the moron still thinks it’s all an illusion. Seaton has the arrogance of Richard Dawkins and the brains of Dr. Oz – not a good mix.
Tangina also shows up and declares that Kane is after Carol Anne again. Bruce opts to go with Tangina’s plan over Seaton’s as he’s desperate to get Donna back. Patricia is still a fucking bitch. She wants to send Carol Anne back and doesn’t give a shit what happens to the little girl. She comes around at the end and suddenly decides she does want to save the kid – too fucking late, in my opinion. Fuck Patricia! Seriously, Pat is the one who is biologically related to Carol Anne and she just doesn’t care. She is all about self-preservation. She’s weak, she whines all the time, and I’m not crazy about her wardrobe or hair either. Bruce is a dapper gent with a killer smile. He’s got game and could do far better. I don’t know what it is about Bruce and Donna that make them go for the biggest pussies ever, but they need higher standards.
In the end, everyone does come together in a last ditch effort to save Carol Anne. The original conclusion which is available on Youtube is far superior to what we were left with, but considering what the cast, crew and filmmakers were dealing with after O’Rourke’s passing, it is more than completely forgiven.
Though the original POLTERGEIST (1982) is admittedly a better movie, I enjoy watching this one far more often. It’s got some silliness to it and once again, I fucking love mirrors. I don’t know. It’s a weird horror kick. I don’t know why I like what I like. Don’t judge me! You like strange shit too or you wouldn’t be reading this.
VUDU and TUBI have this available for free if you don’t mind commercials. If you do, cough up the $2.99 and rent the motherfucker.
Scared Stiff Rating: 7/10
