By James Witherspoon
Yo, check this out. I know what y’all thinking. James, Spacey’s been your boy for years and now you put him on blast? Really? Really? Well, put on the brakes. I’m a journalist first and I’m here to report the facts and as much as I love this mother fucker, I can’t help but to point out the strange things happening to the accusers of Kevin Spacey. This is what they talk about when they talk about that Clinton death count, and I got plenty of my boys telling me that Spacey and the Clintons are friends and nobody crosses them. YA HEARD!
Now, the word just got out that Spacey’s barroom groping accuser that dropped dead also had his case thrown out. Y’all know that Spacey is a big target and groping ain’t that bad. I once had Cuba Gooding, JR., brush against my junk at a party in LA, but he was filming BOAT TRIP. He was just getting in character and it’s all good. YA HEARD!
Maybe we shouldn’t have dismissed Randy Quaid so quickly. These guys got power and money and they can put anyone on blast like they did my boy, Michael Jackson. Yeah, the guy liked boys, but damn, he could sing and gyrate that crotch so fast it went back in time.
I caught up with Kevin Clash, the puppeteer from Sesame Street that was recently cleared of sexual abuse charges, and he had the following to say:
“You make a living with your hand up Elmo’s ass and rumors start. You want to know why that little furry fuck was in Grouchland? It’s because I was elbow deep in his furry ass, but that was my job! For Kevin Spacey, I can give him this advice: Don’t shove your hand up a puppet’s ass or anyone else’s ass either. For some reason, they like throwing you in prison if you fist somebody. What next, I get arrested for punching Big Bird in the dick? Sadly, I can’t get a job anymore. I tried to get a job at Wal-Mart and showed them my skills, but when the manager couldn’t sit down for 3 weeks, they quickly sent me packing.”
(Comments may not be those of Kevin Clash.)
