By Melissa Antoinette Garza
While updating the website, I was shocked to see that I never personally reviewed CHILDREN SHOULDN’T PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS (1972). I should have done this years ago, but now, that I have a MELISSA’S OBSESSIONS category to put it in, it would be a crime not to write a review and include this film.
God, I miss Bob Clark! Some fans will site A CHRISTMAS STORY (1983) or PORKY’S (1981) as his finest work, but for horror fans we’ll look to the classic BLACK CHRISTMAS and the underrated cult gem CHILDREN SHOULDN’T PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS.
This movie is insanely brilliant. It follows a pompous, selfish and elaborately dressed director named Alan (Alan Ormsby). He brings his theater troupe to a deserted island with only a rat infested cabin and a graveyard. He threatens to fire them if they don’t do exactly what he says, including a seance, pranks, and digging up a dead body of a man named Orville (Seth Skarley).
They bring Orville back to the cabin and Alan does a strange impromptu wedding ceremony where he marries the corpse. Though, the crew grows tired of Alan’s attitude and actions, they all stay and play nice in hopes of remaining in his favor and keeping their jobs.
It isn’t until one of the girl’s, Anya (Anya Ormsby) feels something isn’t right and believes that Orville is angry that the others become frightened enough to leave regardless of Alan’s insistence on staying.
It is only then that they find the seance worked and the group are now stranded on an island with pissed off zombies.
When I was a child, I had seen this film. For years, I wanted to find this movie, but could only remember a single scene where one character pushes another into the zombies. It frightened me so much that it stuck with me. Years later, my brother found the movie and we watched it again. That was roughly 20 years ago now, and it’s become a staple every October. We watch it at least once a year.
It’s such a fantastic flick, but as I view it now, I am shocked that I watched it when I was only about 6 years old. Back then, they had these movies on regular TV during the day and on the weekends. My older siblings would be watching the SPINE TINGLERS: MOVIE OF THE WEEK and thus I grew up watching these movies at far too young an age. Still, that’s one part of my childhood I wouldn’t change. I have such fond memories of these great flicks, and it helped make me into the insane, horror-loving gal I am today, and I like me.
One thing to consider when watching this is that it came out 7 years before THE EVIL DEAD (1981). Now, I’m obviously a huge fan of THE EVIL DEAD, but I do wonder if Sam Raimi had taken any inspiration as there are several scenes that otherwise are eerily similar.
This is a perfect flick. The concept is awesome. The acting is fantastically campy. There are a few genuine scares. Some are turned off by the way Alan talks, but it fits his character perfectly and Ormsby sells every second of it.
I’ve shown this film to countless people and each one became a fan. Over the years, a cult following did develop, but this movie still doesn’t get the recognition it deserves. Years before his untimely death, Bob Clark was going to remake this film. The early concepts and ideas thrown around were less than stellar and included a rapping zombie, but I’m still sad we didn’t get to see the end result. I love Clark’s contributions, especially those to the horror genre.
Currently, CHILDREN SHOULDN’T PLAY WITH DEAD THINGS is streaming on PRIME and free on YOUTUBE. If you haven’t seen the film, watch it and if it’s been a little while, watch it again and share it with friends.
SCARED STIFF RATING: 10/10
