By James
Yo, check this out. I was walking down the street to my favorite grinder shop when this fat ass soy boy started telling me that the need to raise the minimum wage. Buddy boy, get a job first and then we can talk about wages. YA HEARD! I then saw these scumbags holding signs, looking for handouts. I wanted to puke in my shoes. Then one of them screamed “Yo James. Your boy Jack Black is dead!” I was devastated. I never wanted to EVER hear that about Jack Black, but I ran home and called by boy and this was a death hoax by some keyboard warrior, cellar dweller, soy boy geek that wanted to cause trouble.
“James, I got goose bumps when I heard that some asshat soy boy said I was dead. I am trying to have a god damn career here and I don’t need some guy who’s living in his mommy’s basement spreading shit about me. I’m ready to go kung Fu panda on their ass. They’re going to be introduced to my school of cock. I’m that FURIOUS! Please James take care of this. I have so many things to do.”
You got it Jack. I’ll handle this.