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Righteous Kill
In Bruges| Tokyo Gore Police (2008) |
 Tokyo Gore Police (2008)
Reviewed by Leeann Aubuchon – February 8, 2010
“Tokyo Gore Police” is a quirky Japanese gore film directed by Yoshihiro Nishimura. This film takes place in Tokyo at some point in the distant future. Police have been privatized and their mission is to hunt down and destroy mutant serial killers known as “engineers”. When a human is killed by an engineer a key shaped gene is some how transplanted into them and then they too become a murderous, malformed psychopath (his/her wound transforming into a weapon). Ruka played by Eihi Shiina is the movie’s heroine a short skirt wearing, weapon wielding young cop from this special unit. Apparently, Ruka is a part of this squad to avenge her father’s assassination. This is the entire plot and sub-plot of the movie. |
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| The A-Team (1983) |
 The A-Team (1983)
Reviewed by Melissa McGahee - February 8, 2010
“I just love it when a plan comes together.” - Hannibal Smith (George Peppard)
Later this year, a remake of the 80s television show “The A-Team” will make its way to the big screen. I’ve seen the trailer and I’m optimistic. They used a narration that is extremely close to the original opening. The black GMC van is being used and it looks just the same. It appears to be well-cast. Yes, my hopes are up! It was seeing that trailer that made me think back to my childhood. I remember watching The A-Team when I was a child and loving it so I decided to take a trip down memory lane. Nostalgia got the best of me and I’m mighty glad it did. The show surpassed my expectations and is even better than I had remembered it.
As the narration states, “In 1972 a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire the A-Team.” Has any opening to any show ever been that exciting? Has anything ever revved you up quite as much? This brilliant dialogue sets the tone for the whole show and the show itself never disappoints.
The A-Team is made up of four men. B.A. Baracus (Mr. T) is the muscle of the group. He’s a tough no-nonsense guy who can break through ropes and beat up anyone especially when the others are in trouble. There’s one thing however that he fears: flying. Whenever a mission comes along that requires flying rest assured poor B.A. will be drugged and be just as assured when he wakes up he’ll be angry. Not that you can blame him. The pilot Murdock (Dwight Schultz) and my personal favorite of The A-Team is a few cards short of a deck. In the majority of the episodes he is broken out of a VA Hospital to assist in the missions. In one episode, as B.A. is fast asleep, the plane begins to seize. The leader of the group Hannibal (George Peppard) asks the con of the group Face (Dirk Benedict) where he obtained the plane from. Murdock interrupts and explains that he secured it. He actually stole it from a repair line. Nonetheless, it isn’t difficult to understand B.A.’s apprehension when it comes to flying. |
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| Breakdown (1997) |
 Breakdown (1997)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – February 5, 2010
I don’t like truckers. I don’t like their cowboy hats. I don’t like the Nascar T shirts. I don’t like the skin tight denim jeans that they all wear. Aren’t denim jeans the wrong sort of thing to wear when you are going cross country? I guess I’m just not getting the philosophy…the lifestyle of the trucker. I know that they get stuck in time. They keep moving all over the country and don’t realize that the mullet is out of style. They think that cowboy hats look sharp. Maybe some lot lizards find that sexy…I don’t know. I guess my point is that I don’t like truckers.
The 1997 movie “BREAKDOWN” is about truckers, more or less. It stars Kurt Russell as Jeff Taylor, a guy starting a new life with his wife, Amy (Kathleen Quinlan). While driving through the desert, they encounter a real prick. He cuts them off in his black pick up truck and then meets up with them at the gas station. As Taylor pumps gas, Earl (M.C. Gainey) approaches and tells Taylor that he needs a CB and a handle when out there in the desert. He then says: “I’m thinking for you…shit for brains.” What a zinger.
Driving onward, the Jeff’s truck begins to overheat and it dies in the middle of the desert. Coming to his aide is a trucker named “Red Barr” played by the late and great J.T. Walsh. He offers to drive the couple to Belle’s Diner, a truck stop up the road so they can call a tow truck. Not wanting to leave his truck behind, Jeff stays and Amy jumps into the truck and drives down the road. It becomes obvious after a while that Amy is not coming back. |
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| Legacy of Blood (1971) |
 Legacy of Blood (1971)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – February 2, 2010
I love overdramatic horror movies and I have found no other film nearly as overdramatic as this 1970’s gem, Legacy of Blood. Written and directed by Carl Monson, we see four relatives moving into a mansion in hopes to inherit the wealth of their deceased father. Every one of the characters in this film has some sort of flaw and harbor a secret that hangs over the family like a dark cloud. It all surrounds the evil that was dear old dad was and the torment that he put his family through. Even though he is dead, his terror lives on and a serial killer now hunts down the family in this great whodunit.
The will that father Dean left would leave the money to his heirs but if they were all deceased, the money would go to Igor (Buck Kartalian) and Elga (Ivy Bethune), his employees that maintained the house and did what he asked, even if it meant acting like a monkey and getting whipped like poor Igor did, although he gives the impression that he really likes it. Not only is the family dysfunctional, but so too is the help, and they need to be. In a whodunit, you need suspects and when people aren’t right, they are automatically suspects. Igor, laughing maniacally, whipping the floor is certainly a guy that could be wielding an axe and killing people at the gathering, but he may be too obvious. |
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| The Lunar Pack (2004) |
 The Lunar Pack (2004)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – January 27, 2010
I am a fan of anthologies. You have a better chance to get something enjoyable out of it then you would a full length movie featuring just one tale. In the microbudget horror world, anthologies may be a good idea because even the bad filmmaker will find dumb luck in one of the tales and people will dig the movie because of it. In a 50 pack called “TOMB OF TERRORS,” I found a movie called “THE LUNAR PACK,” an anthology from filmmaker Jason Liquori.
We begin with Mistress Misty (Debbie Rochon) in her castle…well, it’s a horrible green screen deal with the cartoonish castle placed in the background, but this is no budget, so you have to accept that, and I did. Misty is sort of a knockoff of Elvira, and leads us into each tale. She has a couple of kids, one of which she claims is the child of the Creature from the Black Lagoon. The other is some mutated thing that drinks blood. Overall, I wasn’t too annoyed with Misty. Usually this sort of character would irritate me, but Rochon wasn’t that bad in the role, although the dialogue she had to work with was very painful. |
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| Geno McGahee reveals the trailer for his FAMILY SECRET |
 Geno McGahee reveals the trailer for his FAMILY SECRET
X Posse Productions Press Release – January 25, 2010
The filming completed on October 4, 2009, and now Geno McGahee reveals the trailer for his soon to be released horror movie FAMILY SECRET. Check out the trailer for the horror film that has already created a buzz in the horror world.
X Posse Productions & Webhead Entertainment presents Geno McGahee's FAMILY SECRET.
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| The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) |
 The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)
Reviewed by Melissa McGahee – January 25, 2010
“They didn’t like me! They never liked me!” - Riff Raff (Richard O’Brien)
I recall the first time I saw “The Rocky Horror Picture Show“. It was a Friday night and I was just around 12 years old. I had gone grocery shopping with my mother and on the way home she let me stop by and with my allowance rent a movie from a local video store. I had no idea what it was about and now I can’t even remember why I was compelled enough to rent it. Nonetheless, I was never quite the same afterwards, and today the movie remains my favorite of all time. I’ve seen it performed live too many times to count and I’ve introduced more friends of mine to it than I remember. More than any of that, one of the deciding initial factors that led me to pursue my fiancé was his admiration for the film as well. Needless to say, it’s had quite an impact on my life.
For those who have never had the honor of experiencing RHPS allow me to explain the overall plot. A young and very conservative couple, Brad (Barry Bostwick) and Janet (Susan Sarandon) become engaged upon witnessing their best friends marry. They decide to take a trip and tell the scientist Dr. Everett Scott (Jonathon Adams) that brought them together the happy news. They make their way on a very rainy dark night and their tire blows. With no workable spare to throw on, the duo make their way to a castle up the street.
Janet is very frightened and opts to return to the car, but Brad who is the All American Boy assures her that all will be fine as soon as they use the phone and call for help. He rings the doorbell and is welcomed by my all-time favorite character, Riff Raff (Richard O’Brien). He lets the couple come in and advises them that they have arrived on a very special night. |
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| Swimming with Sharks (1994) |
 Swimming with Sharks (1994)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee - January 21, 2010
I think that everyone has encountered an asshole boss. I had one when I worked at Roy Rogers in the nineties. His name was “Carmichael.” What a prick…a white-haired prick. In SWIMMING WITH SHARKS, we deal with a prick boss. Buddy (Kevin Spacey) is about as cruel and insulting as a boss can be, chucking paperclips at folders at his new assistant, Guy (Frank Whaley). Now, I should mention that you cannot go wrong with Kevin Spacey. Sure, he is in some bad movies like K-PAX and 21, but the guy can act and there aren’t many in his class. When he’s on the screen, he steals it, and he does it here as Buddy.
Who can forget THE NEGOTIATOR? What a fan-fucking-tastic movie that was. I have seen that one about a million times, and I also enjoyed A TIME TO KILL. Hmm…both Samuel L. Jackson and Kevin Spacey were in both films. Strange. Jackson can’t carry Spacey’s jock when it comes to acting, but they still work well together.
Now we begin at a Hollywood studio. Guy is young and enthusiastic, just landing the job as the assistant to the boss, Buddy. He is warned right away that it is a thankless job, but that everyone that has occupied it has gone on to bigger and better things. Guy seems prepared for the tough work environment, but he doesn’t realize just how tough it is. Buddy is very abusive, screaming at him in front of the other employees, taking credit for anything that he does, and calling him at all hours of the night to return to the office for the most unimportant things. He is beginning to crack. |
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| The Final Destination (2009) |
 The Final Destination (2009)
Reviewed by Melissa McGahee – January 19, 2010
“I’ve been trying to kill myself all day.” - George (Mykelti Williamson)
When the first installment of the Final Destination series was released in 2000, it brought a breath of fresh air to horror with it. The plot was inventive, the acting was decent, and the characters were overall likable. It was an enjoyable and successful movie that was destined to spark sequels. Unfortunately, the subsequent films were unable to retain any of the elements which made their predecessor so interesting.
Now, if we believe the advertisements, the creators, and the title of the third sequel, it appears that the series has come to an end with “The Final Destination.” Though, I’m not convinced that this is in fact the last time we’ll see the battle with death, I do hope if they ever to bring it back more thought is put into the production.
The movie opens at a car racing event where the main character Nick (Bobby Campo) obtains a premonition of sorts. He sees an accident occur and many of those watching including himself and his friends die a horrid death. Once he snaps out of it and realizes he had a flash into the future he starts a ruckus and persuades his friends and a few others to leave with him. As the security guard George (Mykelti Williamson) tries to make sense of the what Nick is saying, the event he predicted takes place thus making everyone believers. |
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| Halloween Resurrection (2002) |
 Halloween Resurrection (2002)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee –January 12, 2010
I recently watched HALLOWEEN H20: 20 YEARS LATER and it was so bad that I decided to give the follow up a second chance. I watched HALLOWEEN RESURRECTION in 2002 when it first came out and I wasn’t too happy with it. I know that they try to appeal to the young but the continual inclusion of rap stars into horror films is sickening. In the last movie, LL Cool J was placed in a role and now we have Busta Rhymes as an Internet reality show producer named Freddie Harris. Maybe I could deal with that if that was the only problem, but there are far more things to deal with this 2002 entry.
If you remember H20 and I wouldn’t blame you if you erased it from your memory, you will remember the conclusion when Michael Myers was beheaded by Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis). There, the series is over…the boogeyman is dead, BUT there is money to be made and they brought him back. Well, they had to explain how he survives a beheading. Apparently he crushed the voice box of an EMT and then dressed him up in the mask and jumpsuit. Strode drives off with the EMT and kills him, not Myers, while he slips into the night, planning on an eventual return.
Now, the EMT deserved to die no matter what as he escaped the body bag and attacked strode, carrying on the evil work of Myers. Why did they put the EMT in a body bag when he only had a destroyed voice box? Wouldn’t it have been easier to say that Strode imagined the beheading? She is standing there with the axe and thinks it before the cops come up and take her away and then pry Myers away from that tree and he lives on. Why did they go with the EMT angle? If you saw H20, you have to scratch your head over this one. If I made Resurrection, I would say: “H20 is shit. Fuck H20. Ignore it,” and start where number six left off. |
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| Wolf Creek (2005) |
 Wolf Creek (2005)
Reviewed by Leeann Aubuchon – January 11, 2010
(Publisher’s Note: Leeann Aubuchon is the newest writer on Scared Stiff Reviews and will be covering horror both foreign and domestic. We welcome her aboard!)
“Wolf Creek” is an Australian horror film inspired by true events, written and directed by Greg McLean.
The film begins by introducing the three protagonists, Cassandra Magrath as Liz Hunter, Kestie Morassi as Kristy Earl and Nathan Phillips as Ben Mitchell. The three carefree 20-somethings decide to go on a road trip together to Wolf Creek National Park, the site of a large crater formed by a meteorite. Everything is relatively lighthearted until the trio return from their hike to see the crater, only to discover that their car will not start. After dark, a bushman by the name of Mick Taylor played by actor John Jarratt comes across the stranded friends and offers to give them a tow to his camp and repair their car. Once at the old mining camp, things go terribly awry for the three.
The Good: The technical aspects of the film are top notch. The picture is crisp, clear, and colorful. The use of sound in this movie is very effective, heightening suspense and adding to the eeriness factor of the scenes. Acting is suburb all around but I give special kudos to John Jarratt. Jarratt plays an amazing brutally realistic, sadistic serial killer. Frankly, he scared the begeebers out of me… I am left begeeberless. While watching “Wolf Creek” I was affectionately reminded of classic American 1970s slasher flicks, which leads me to the less desirable aspects of the film. |
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| Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998) |
 Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – January 9, 2010
I have always considered HALLOWEEN one of the best horror movies of all time and the strongest series of horror flicks, better as a whole than the other big two: FRIDAY THE 13TH and A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET, and when Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) was returning, I initially was excited. I saw the trailer where she came face to face with Michael Myers and they played that familiar music that is synonymous with the series, you couldn’t help but to be optimistic.
The first problem with H20 is the fact that John Carpenter had nothing to do with it. He declined the offer to write it, which brought in Robert Zappia, who wrote on episode of that great show HOME IMPROVEMENT. I hope you can sense the sarcasm. I hated that show. I like Tim Allen….he’s rather funny in the movies, especially WILD HOGS, but that show was horrible and now they brought in a guy that wrote one episode to write such an important movie? Jeez.
A big problem I noticed here as well is the acting of Jamie Lee Curtis. She had made a big career for herself since the first HALLOWEEN and came back with a new attitude and it really seemed that her acting ability declined over the years. The more that she thought about being a good actress, the worse she got, and the moment she wakes up from a nightmare screaming in this movie, it’s unbelievable. Her acting is terrible, but don’t worry, we also have her son John (Josh Hartnett), and those of you that have had the pleasure of seeing Hartnett act, you know what I’m talking about when I say that he is horrible. You put him and Curtis together, it’s torture.
The basic story here is the inner struggle of Laurie Strode. She is the dean of a private school and is still living with the pain of the past, having nightmares and never getting over the horrible night in 1978. She overprotects her son, causing much tension between the two. John wants to just have some time with his hot girlfriend Molly (Michelle Williams), but Laurie has that “I wanna smell your fingers” expression throughout the movie, preventing John from nailing his girl. Where is the trust? |
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| Frailty (2001) |
 Frailty (2001)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee - January 7, 2010
In 2001, Bill Paxton directed the movie “FRAILTY.” I have been a Bill Paxton fan for some time. The first time I saw Paxton was when he was heckling a naked Arnold Schwarzenegger in the 1984 film “THE TERMINATOR.” In 1985, he was the older prick brother in the semi-classic “WEIRD SCIENCE,” and then made his name in the horror world with the vampire flick “NEAR DARK.” He has been consistent and always gives a great performance, even when he deals with a mediocre script like PREDATOR 2.
In FRAILTY, we have Paxton as Dad Meiks, a mechanic working hard to take care of his two young sons. His wife died and now he is on his own, working a lot of hours. His older son, Fenton (Matt O’Leary), takes care of his younger brother, Adam (Jeremy Sumpter), while his covers all the bills. It is a happy and productive family.
One night, Dad storms into his sons’ room and wakes them up. He tells them that he was visited by an angel and that God had a very special mission for him. There are demons on the earth and God needs people like Dad Meiks to kill them. Adam immediately believes his father while Fenton cannot and thinks that the cheese fell off his dad’s cracker. Shortly after the meeting with angel, weapons are supplied to kill the demons: an axe and a pipe. Those are the weapons that God supplied, which makes Fenton even more doubtful about his dad’s meeting.
One night, Fenton is called over by his father. Lying near his shed is a woman tied up and bleeding. In front of his oldest son, Dad murders her with an axe. As time goes by, Dad kills more and more, all names on a list supplied by God. Fenton doesn’t know what to do, but he eventually goes to the police. They automatically dismiss the claims and he has to deal with his Dad, and the punishment is severe. Fenton is locked underground, underneath the shed until he sees the light. Dad is also fighting one of his instructions…to kill a demon. That demon is his son, Fenton. |
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| Murder Mansion (1972) |
 Murder Mansion (1972)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – January 6, 2010
A young couple gets lost in the fog and takes refuge in an old creepy mansion. That right there has a world of potential, and I had high hopes for MURDER MANSION, a 1970’s Italian horror film. Italy has produced a lot of good horror and the states has been heavily influenced by their output. The style with the use of colors and music set a creepy tone and in MURDER MANSION, we have it here. The film has a very creepy look and feel to it.
We have a group of people that somehow end up at a mansion in an abandoned town, but first they see something strange at the local cemetery. Two ghostly figures approach the people from the cemetery as the fog rolls in. It is a very creepy scene. Even creepier is the mansion where the group takes refuge. Inside hangs the eeriest painting I have ever seen. A pale elderly woman with a slight smirk hangs on the wall. It appears that she is looking at the viewer. Creepy stuff people.
The group is informed of a legend that surrounds the area. Vampire roam the night and seem to enjoy hanging out at the cemetery. Why can’t vampires hang out at fun places like the arcade? Well, with the Xbox and Playstation, I’m sure that they would just stay home and play the games. Arcades are really a thing of the past. So the two figures at the cemetery are apparently vampires and the legend is true! |
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| Picture Mommy Dead (1966) |
 Picture Mommy Dead (1966)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee - January 2, 2010
We begin with a fire in a room and a woman lying dead on the floor. The flames engulf the bed and the walls along with the drapery and furniture. A young girl appears next to the dead body and begins saying a creepy poem and then removes a necklace from the woman’s body. So far, so good.
Susan (Susan Gordon), the child, went away to an asylum after the incident. She returned home in the care of her father, Edward (Don Ameche). Although he loves his daughter, he knows that should she die or get sent back to the asylum, he would assume the rights to her inheritance. This is a fact that does not escape his wealth loving wife, Francene (Martha Hyer). Edward had pissed through all of his money, living lavishly to impress and keep his wife happy and now he is broke. He hopes that the return of his daughter could bring his head above water.
There is a lot of mystery around the death of Susan’s mother, Jessica (Zsa Zsa Gabor), and plenty of suspects in the matter. The obvious is young Susan. She is seeing ghostly images. Her toys are mocking her and she is having hallucinations. She keeps seeing her mother and believes that the ghost is contacting her. She is also an emotional wreck. |
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| Superman (1978) |
 Superman (1978)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – December 28, 2009
A planet is about to explode, so Jor-El (Marlon Brando) sends his son to earth. A young naked boy sent to the world into the arms of an old man. No, this isn’t about a Scout leader’s fantasy. This happens in the very opening of SUPERMAN. We are introduced to a very young Superman that gets adopted by the older couple, the Kents. They raise him as a normal human, but when he turns into a teen it gets rough. He wants to show off and get some chicks but he cannot. He can run past a train and impress the passengers, but he is not allowed to show his abilities to the world. There was a definite danger with him showing his super abilities. What if he did and it impressed the women and they wanted to have sex with him? Could they handle the ride? The only hope for survival would be if he went faster than a speeding bullet.
Now if you have a good guy you have to have a bad guy. Lex Luthor (Gene Hackman) is a criminal mastermind with hopes of ruling the world. Working with him is his dimwit friend Otis (Ned Beatty) and hot girlfriend Eve Teschmacher (Valerie Perrine). Now Otis isn’t much help at all throughout the entire movie and I cannot blame him for his inadequacies. He was ass raped in 1972 by back woods perverts. That screwed him up and all of his misdeeds should be forgiven. He should never serve a day in prison. Luthor was never ass raped…at least not in the movie DELIVERANCE like Beatty/Otis was.
Hackman is a wonderful actor and although he does very well as Luthor, I think that the producers missed the boat a little with him. They geared this movie for all audiences and therefore, to appease the children, they made the bad guys sort of goofy, when they could have made Luthor frightening. BUT all things considered Hackman did well as the bad guy. |
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| Robocop (1987) |
 Robocop (1987)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – December 23, 2009
“Your move creep.” – Robocop (Peter Weller)
I was 13 years old when I first saw the trailer to the movie “ROBOCOP.” Why don’t they make movies like this anymore? I just bought the triple pack DVD set with all three entries in this series for only eight bucks. How can you beat that?
This movie takes place in the future and the crime rate has gone up to record numbers. The cops are losing their lives left and right and there is no cure in sight to make the world a better place. Transferred into Detroit, the very troubled city in question in this film, is Murphy (Peter Weller), and is teamed up with badass female cop, Anne Lewis (Nancy Allen). He notices her at first when she beats up a male suspect and I would not be surprised if Officer Lewis has a penis. She was quite manly. Some women can pull off short hair…she just couldn’t.
As the police try to take back the streets, a large corporation has signed a contract with the city to bring in their own force to help fight the crime. They have the “Ed 209,” a giant robot that doesn’t take shit from anyone and is being pushed heavily by Dick Jones (Ronny Cox). Isn’t it weird to have a guy named “Cox” playing a guy named “Dick?” Just a thought. |
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| Geno McGahee reveals the trailer for his FAMILY SECRET |
Geno McGahee reveals the trailer for his FAMILY SECRET
X Posse Productions Press Release – December 22, 2009
The filming completed on October 4, 2009, and now Geno McGahee reveals the trailer for his soon to be released horror movie FAMILY SECRET. Check out the trailer for the horror film that has already created a buzz in the horror world.
X Posse Productions & Webhead Entertainment presents Geno McGahee's FAMILY SECRET.
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| Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984) |
 Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984) Reviewed by Geno McGahee - December 22, 2009
“If you see Santa Claus tonight, you better run boy. You better run for your life!” -- Grandpa Chapman (Will Hare)
I love Christmas movies...well, I don't like that Christmas Story where that chubby kid gets the B.B. Gun that everyone seems to like. I even like those claymation Rudolf and Santa Claus programs where they dance and sing. Didn't the California Raisins have an Xmas special too? Well, there is another great Christmas movie that doesn't get as much air time, but is just as good, if not better than the rest. That movie is the 1984 classic: “Silent Night, Deadly Night.”
Before I get into the review, I should probably mention that this movie was pulled from the cinemas when fat housewives complained and even protested with signs in hands outside of the theaters because there is a killer Santa in this film. What a crock. Shame on them for protesting and shame on the production company for pulling it because of this pressure. Shove a twinkie in those fat housewives' mouths and they'll be happy, but they caved in. The fact that this movie was initially pulled may be responsible for it not being seen anywhere nowadays. It's a shame.
Now even though this movie is from 1984, it has the 1970s written all over it, with the brutality and the nothing sacred approach to horror films. We begin with the Chapman family. Ellie (Tara Buckman) and her husband Jim (Geoff Hansen) along with their two children, Billy (Danny Wagner) and Ricky (Max Broadhead), are on a trip to see Jim's grandfather, “Grandpa Chapman,” played by the very talented Will Hare. Hare is fantastic and is one of the best horror characters of all time, and although he was in 48 films in his career, I have to call Silent Night, Deadly Night, his best effort by far. |
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| Black Christmas (1974) |
 Black Christmas (1974)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee - December 22, 2009
This has to be one of the greatest horror films of all time...a slasher that actually frightens you. Bob Clark directs this masterpiece, and it should be noted that he also directed and co-wrote another classic from 1972: "Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things." In Black Christmas, we have a sorority house on Christmas break. They are being terrorized by what is believed to be a prank caller, but this person is very disturbed. The caller has the ability to use different voices, says vulgar things, and makes pig noises. The phone calls are VERY strange.
One of the characters that really shines is Barbie Coard, played by Margot Kidder (Superman, Superman II, Superman III, and even the horrible Superman IV). Barbie is a drunk and raw girl that says what is on her mind at all times. The way that she plays with people and intentionally annoy them is hilarious. Kidder really captured the role and made it her own. She was fantastic in this movie.
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| The Blair Witch Project (1999) |
 The Blair Witch Project (1999)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee - December 18, 2009
"I just want to apologize to Josh's mom, and Mike's mom, and my mom. I am so sorry! Because it was my fault. I was the one who brought them here. I was the one that said "keep going south." I was the one who said that we were not lost. It was my fault, because it was my project."--Heather (Heather Donahue)
Three college students disappear and a year later, this film footage turns up. Heather (Heather Donahue), Josh (Joshua Leonard), and Mike (Michael Williams), are in the woods and doing a documentary on a legend known as “The Blair Witch Project.” They begin to interview people of the town…mostly elderly. Hey, they’ve got nothing else going on. They can take a break from walking around aimlessly through the mall right?
After interviewing the peeps, they make their way into the woods, where this supposed witch resides. During this time, nearly everything is filmed. They film their arguments, and their hike through the wilderness. Being so far into the wilderness, they have to camp out and that’s where the strange stuff begins. They begin hearing noises at first and then the tent starts shaking, and finally, they see the legend, face to face, prompting Heather to scream: “What the @#$@ is that?!!!”
For some reason, Mike gets rid of the one thing that can help them escape this madness: the map. The map which will lead them out of the woods was destroyed by this moron, which is one of the absurd points of this movie. No matter how stupid a person is, and I know a lot of stupid people, I can’t see them doing something like that, but this is a movie about a wicked witch of the woods and we will have to suspend disbelief. |
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| Savage Harvest (1994) |
 Savage Harvest (1994)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – December 14, 2009
A lot of Native Americans are either responsible for troubles within a horror movie or are there to help the people fighting an evil force. If you have problems with natural problems like the Sasquatch or some other beast of the woods, you will often find one of the characters contacting a mysterious Native American for advice. If you have a ghost problem, it is highly likely that your house was built on an ancient Indian burial ground. You never find a normal Native American in a horror movie…I guess that is my point. It is sort of like fat girls in horror movies. They are always stuffing their faces excessively, just enforcing the idea that they are obese. Horror movies are known for stereotyping people.
So in the 1994 horror indie “SAVAGE HARVEST” we have the legend of a Cherokee tribe that accidentally released some demonic spirits into the world. Flashbacks of the Cherokee chief crying and sitting next to a fire accompany the story. So we are dealing with demons here and a group of young adults that are camping near a lake. Of course, the Cherokee curse comes forth and the campers begin to turn into killer demons, much like the movie EVIL DEAD.
I mention EVIL DEAD because this movie is so heavily inspired by it. What SAVAGE HARVEST did well was to have very good gore for this level of film, but that is where the positive elements end. The acting is beyond dreadful. I can deal with bad acting, but the director should also be called into question. When the friends are becoming possessed and are getting ripped apart and the threat of the demons is eminent, the survivors seem oblivious to everything. There is zero emotion and it takes away from the little that this movie has going for it. |
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| Warning Sign (1985) |
 Warning Sign (1985)
Reviewed by Melissa McGahee – December 8, 2009
The film “Warning Sign” follows a premise very similar to that of many other science fiction and horror productions. The general plot develops when a formula created by the government to use in warfare is spread throughout an entire building. The result is that the bacteria manifests inside the victims and turns them into confused zombies. Again, this doesn’t sound like a unique or original movie however due to one single factor “Warning Sign” stands out as something near spectacular. Thanks completely to the unparalleled great acting delivered by the cast there is not a single moment where the audience is not on the edge of their seat in anticipation.
In a small rural town where unemployment was at nearly 30%, the government found a solution that would create jobs for the community. They built the chemical laboratory Bio-Tek and hired those who needed a place to work. Everything was operating smoothly until a chemical was unleashed within the building. The security guard Joanie (Kathleen Quinlan) had to shut down the building to ensure that the contamination did not spread to the outside. Initially, those infected felt fine. Tom Schmidt (G.W. Bailey) who had trained Joanie what to do in the event of a lockdown begged her to open the hospital as he was sure those on his floor were not infected. He even used a light detector that would reflect neon blue on those who had the virus to be sure. When the virus was not seen, he once again pleaded with Joanie to release them. Still, Joanie followed protocol. Soon, the group of workers grew restless and fearful. When they could not threaten or overpower Joanie verbally, they broke down her door with an axe and despite Tom’s pleas to be easy with her, the group shocked with electric wires into revealing a code that would unlock the doors. By this time, the government had changed the code and they were all still stuck within the building.
Soon the first victim of the virus started going into convulsions and displayed no signs of life -for awhile. When he did awake he was confused, disoriented and violent. Blisters were visible on his face and he was driven by the extinct to murder. One by one all those within the building began turning, except Joanie. She, for reasons revealed later, was immune to the toxin and merely stuck running for her life away from those who were once friends - but now wanted to kill her.
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| Predator (1987) |
 Predator (1987)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – December 4, 2009
“If it bleeds, we can kill it.” – Dutch (Arnold Schwarzenegger)
Dutch (Arnold Schwarzenegger) heads a team of commandos and he is called in for a job by an old friend, Dillon (Carl Weathers). It seems that some of “their guys” are being held hostage in Central America, and it is time to rescue them, or at least that’s the story that Dutch is given. An unnecessary in the air arm wrestling contest between Dutch and Dillon occurs immediately just to show off the guns of the stars. “What’s the matter? The CIA got you pushing too many pencils,” Dutch comments. You get the feeling that Dillon wanted to respond: “I got a pencil for you to push meathead.”
Initially, when Dutch and his gang get off of the helicopter to meet up with Apollo Creed there, he stays behind momentarily to light his cigar and take a big drag off of it. I hope to god that he didn’t give Jesse “The Body” Ventura a Lewinski… I think that I am not alone when I say that cigars are exclusively associated with oral sex.
Dutch, Dillon, and a crew of bad asses get dropped off in a Central American jungle to kick ass and take names. We have the rude tough guy, Blain (Jesse Ventura), the Native American that will automatically sense something because every Native American in film has a secret sense where they can sense weather and/or aliens, Billy (Sonny Landham), the quiet guy, Mac (Bill Duke), the jokester Hawkins (Shane Black), and rounding up the group is Poncho (Richard Chavez), who really has nothing going for him in this flick. He is just there and the Predator is chomping at the bit for a victim. He’s perfect. Nobody would miss him.
The group finds the camp where American soldiers are being killed, which put them into kick ass mode, and what is a Schwarzenegger movie without some decent action film lines. When he kicks in a door, he says, “knock knock.” When he throws a knife through a guy and he sticks the wall, he says, “stick around.” I love 1980’s action films and the cheesy lines that they put into them. I also like some of the little things, and little things mean a lot, that they put into this film. At one point, one of the bad guys at the camp is on fire…completely engulfed and still trying to take out Dutch with machine gun in hand. Typically, most would try to extinguish the fire first. That would be objective numero uno, but not this guy. They set him on fire, so he’s going to kick some Arnold ass. Sadly (spoiler), he gets shot with a machine gun while on fire and presumed dead.
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| The Green Mile (1999) |
 The Green Mile (1999)
Reviewed by Geno McGahee – November 29, 2009
“I helped it. Didn’t I help it?” – Michael Clarke Duncan after grabbing the junk of Tom Hanks
Am I the only one that thinks that Tom Hanks is a better actor in drag? Remember BOSOM BUDDIES? That was a great show and Hanks really shined as a woman. He wasn’t necessarily attractive as a woman but he still got hit on a lot. They say it is all about confidence anyway, right? If you have that aura of confidence, looks are irrelevant.
So Hanks is back in the 1999 Stephen King movie “THE GREEN MILE,” but not in drag this time. He is Paul Edgecomb, a police officer working death row, which is called “The Green Mile.” He works alongside some good friends and one prick that only got the job because of his connections. Percy (Doug Hutchison) is that jerk that treats the prisoners poorly and talks down to the other guards. He has an issue with one of the prisoners by the name of Delacroix (Michael Jeter), and I don’t blame him. Delacroix is an annoying dimwit. At one point Percy walks by and slams Delacroix’s fingers with his baton and breaks them and he had it coming. So maybe Percy wasn’t that bad after all.
As the guards shoot the shit a prison truck drives up and a monster steps out. The huge John Coffey (Michael Clarke Duncan) is accused of a double murder of two young girls. The big guy seems harmless and is frightened of the dark…but apparently he is a murderer or so the people think. This takes place in the 1930s when they always blamed the black guy and so Coffey was the easy suspect. He was also caught sitting with the two bloody bodies of the young girls, screaming. He was screaming like he was already in prison and some boys were making friendly with him. |
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